More Stuff....
March 4th 2008 04:41
First of all, let me just say Im extinguished. Oh, that thing I wrote about in 'The Glow' is no doubt still there, could even be responsable for these days off Im having. Smouldering away there....But thats all its doing. The thought of blowing on the spark to move or do anything makes me SICK.....
The weathers weird. Out there in the sun I thought I was burning to a crisp, dehydrating in mere seconds, even though I wasnt THAT hot. The air is cool, and here in the house I can feel the cool air creeping....Literaly the second the sun goes down she will reclaim us.
Lets just catch up to where we are before I move on to something far more stimulating.
I decided not to give my notice this week. It was a hard decision, but I had to do it. Lots of things contributed. And I really wanted to give my notice because....
Works been such a shitfight. Honestly. I wanted the weekend off for my best mates birthday. Ive missed the last 2 years not just her birthday, but everyones. Every do and dish, every shindig and hootnany, Kleos had to say no. Why? Because Im showing, or saving up for a show, or paying a vet bill, or.....Something.
So I made up my mind to go. I ended up getting the weekend off, but then I realized - I'll be partying well into sunday, I need MONDAY off! I tried to change it, and it couldnt be done, so the person in charge just said, "have a sick day."
Kleo thought this was an alright plan but the problem is, Kleo doesnt like to lie, not about the shit most people like to lie about. Not when the boss is breathing down my neck about sick time and 'problems' and solving them. So friday afternoon, Kleo ends up in a discussion with the boss. I was handing in the afore mentioned medical certificates.
At this point, I was still absolutely dead cert I was quitting this week.
Still she managed to intimidate me. She danced around the subject at hand and I just KNEW she'd heard rumours about me wanting monday off. So like a hard cold knife through butter I went at the lies - "You know, I'll be honest with you. Im going to a party on Saturday night, a party that may well carry on into Sunday. I wont be home till late, and thats why I may need Monday off."
Let the jousting begin! She started telling me I need to manage my time better - If I was home sunday night, couldnt I come to work monday? Not if I am still under the influence of alcohol! She starts talking me out of the party, and I make my case - I dont play, not ever, Ive always had a good reason for a day off, this would be my first frivolous one. She starts saying, well, work is work and play is play, she'd like to go running off to parties too, but when you have work committments...
She could see I wasnt really listening, just waiting until I could leave. I told her maybe the party would be crap and Id be home early, who knows? I cant remember exactly how it ended but I comforted myself with the thought of my resignation letter.
She did say if I didnt show up it would be Leave Without Pay. I told her I didnt care.
Then, on Friday night, the 'stone bruise' Shakir has been suffering with for about 4 weeks busted out - No stone bruise this, its an abcess! With a full blown infection. I do what I can and pray like hell I wont need an emergency vet. With a vet bill on the way, Im thinking its not smart to quit.
And then I go to the horseland sale......
I went for 1 rug. 1 rug for shakir. I end up with 3 rugs, 2 bridles, a headstall, a gold bit....
So my savings are gone. Its all worth it to see Shakir strut around in his name brand rug - normally only magnus gets name brand stuff, and Shakirs been wearing an old canvas that was invented before any improvements - it vaguely resembles a sheet. His new one has shoulder darts for movement, velcro behind the buckles, no spine seam that water could leak through, elastic rug straps for movement, belly straps, extra large tail flap....
Ok, I just realized if you arent a horse person none of that will be exciting. Just be sure it is to Shakir.
SO, my savings are gone, and Ive also spent heaps on this party. I cant quit, no way. I was not relying on my savings in my quitting plan, I was relying on my wages, but I needed the savings to back me up, so I realize I cant do it.
So I go to the party.....And there are so many entertaining things that happened BEFORE I even got there its amazing, but I cant really tell you..... Anyways, I get a few hours sleep sunday morn, get home sunday afternoon.....
And I decide to go to work. I decide, it wont be so bad, I'll get through it, and prove to the boss that I can do this, that Im prepared to work. She'll cut me some slack - see that Im putting in an effort.
So 6am monday Im standing at roll call with my sunnies on.....And she walks in, and loudly announces in a taunting voice "Good Morning Kim!" And I swear it came out "ner ner ner ner"
Im thinking - what the hell is that? Are we in primary school? Im here arent I? You got what you wanted.
The others tell me the guys are going out for a special exercise. Oh, yay. We get told to check the roster and we get into out boxes. A few hours later, finished and hurting Im in the toilets trying to hold my guts in when I hear my name over the speaker and take off, grey as soiled sheets.
Lets just say, the day was a complete disaster shall we? When hungover, no matter what you do, you're going to do it wrong. Im naturally clumsy anyway, so, I really dont need to go into detail do I?
We go. Dead tired I still run part of the way because I want my early train, I want to get in early and see the doctor and still catch my normal bus.
Now, which injury or disease shall I pick this time? Ive got quite a few, I mean, this doctor doesnt even know about my toes yet! I decide on - Arm Strain. Since I started at this job Ive had a repetitive strain injury to my right arm, its why Ive suddenly gone wiggy about my tools. I used to get shitty with people for hiding 'their' tools, but now I know why they do it. If I dont use the (one and only) short pitchfork, my arm cramps into agony. Even with the short pitch I have issues, Fingers going numb, etc, but its tolerable. So I get in. I wait. Then tell the doc about my arm.
He's a weird one this doc. He wanted to strap my poor swollen toe to its neighbor when it was pulsing with blood. I screamed to kingdom come. Since he's found out about the 'mental' issues he usually wants to blame that. But yesterday he tested both my arms and even I was shocked to see the right weaker than the left. He told ME - this is a repetitive strain from shoveling the straw. I suspect you must not shovel straw anymore. Have 2 days rest, heatpacks, and relax your muscles, then back to work. If you continue to have pain, your employer will have to rehabilitate you. Like thats going to be possible. Its my whole job. Lucky Im leaving....
And guess what? No, really, guess what!? THE JOB rang me today....The one Ive been waiting for. I have an interview next week.
Maybe it wasnt such a bad idea to quit this week?
The weathers weird. Out there in the sun I thought I was burning to a crisp, dehydrating in mere seconds, even though I wasnt THAT hot. The air is cool, and here in the house I can feel the cool air creeping....Literaly the second the sun goes down she will reclaim us.
Lets just catch up to where we are before I move on to something far more stimulating.
I decided not to give my notice this week. It was a hard decision, but I had to do it. Lots of things contributed. And I really wanted to give my notice because....
Works been such a shitfight. Honestly. I wanted the weekend off for my best mates birthday. Ive missed the last 2 years not just her birthday, but everyones. Every do and dish, every shindig and hootnany, Kleos had to say no. Why? Because Im showing, or saving up for a show, or paying a vet bill, or.....Something.
So I made up my mind to go. I ended up getting the weekend off, but then I realized - I'll be partying well into sunday, I need MONDAY off! I tried to change it, and it couldnt be done, so the person in charge just said, "have a sick day."
Kleo thought this was an alright plan but the problem is, Kleo doesnt like to lie, not about the shit most people like to lie about. Not when the boss is breathing down my neck about sick time and 'problems' and solving them. So friday afternoon, Kleo ends up in a discussion with the boss. I was handing in the afore mentioned medical certificates.
At this point, I was still absolutely dead cert I was quitting this week.
Still she managed to intimidate me. She danced around the subject at hand and I just KNEW she'd heard rumours about me wanting monday off. So like a hard cold knife through butter I went at the lies - "You know, I'll be honest with you. Im going to a party on Saturday night, a party that may well carry on into Sunday. I wont be home till late, and thats why I may need Monday off."
Let the jousting begin! She started telling me I need to manage my time better - If I was home sunday night, couldnt I come to work monday? Not if I am still under the influence of alcohol! She starts talking me out of the party, and I make my case - I dont play, not ever, Ive always had a good reason for a day off, this would be my first frivolous one. She starts saying, well, work is work and play is play, she'd like to go running off to parties too, but when you have work committments...
She could see I wasnt really listening, just waiting until I could leave. I told her maybe the party would be crap and Id be home early, who knows? I cant remember exactly how it ended but I comforted myself with the thought of my resignation letter.
She did say if I didnt show up it would be Leave Without Pay. I told her I didnt care.
Then, on Friday night, the 'stone bruise' Shakir has been suffering with for about 4 weeks busted out - No stone bruise this, its an abcess! With a full blown infection. I do what I can and pray like hell I wont need an emergency vet. With a vet bill on the way, Im thinking its not smart to quit.
And then I go to the horseland sale......
I went for 1 rug. 1 rug for shakir. I end up with 3 rugs, 2 bridles, a headstall, a gold bit....
So my savings are gone. Its all worth it to see Shakir strut around in his name brand rug - normally only magnus gets name brand stuff, and Shakirs been wearing an old canvas that was invented before any improvements - it vaguely resembles a sheet. His new one has shoulder darts for movement, velcro behind the buckles, no spine seam that water could leak through, elastic rug straps for movement, belly straps, extra large tail flap....
Ok, I just realized if you arent a horse person none of that will be exciting. Just be sure it is to Shakir.
SO, my savings are gone, and Ive also spent heaps on this party. I cant quit, no way. I was not relying on my savings in my quitting plan, I was relying on my wages, but I needed the savings to back me up, so I realize I cant do it.
So I go to the party.....And there are so many entertaining things that happened BEFORE I even got there its amazing, but I cant really tell you..... Anyways, I get a few hours sleep sunday morn, get home sunday afternoon.....
And I decide to go to work. I decide, it wont be so bad, I'll get through it, and prove to the boss that I can do this, that Im prepared to work. She'll cut me some slack - see that Im putting in an effort.
So 6am monday Im standing at roll call with my sunnies on.....And she walks in, and loudly announces in a taunting voice "Good Morning Kim!" And I swear it came out "ner ner ner ner"
Im thinking - what the hell is that? Are we in primary school? Im here arent I? You got what you wanted.
The others tell me the guys are going out for a special exercise. Oh, yay. We get told to check the roster and we get into out boxes. A few hours later, finished and hurting Im in the toilets trying to hold my guts in when I hear my name over the speaker and take off, grey as soiled sheets.
Lets just say, the day was a complete disaster shall we? When hungover, no matter what you do, you're going to do it wrong. Im naturally clumsy anyway, so, I really dont need to go into detail do I?
We go. Dead tired I still run part of the way because I want my early train, I want to get in early and see the doctor and still catch my normal bus.
Now, which injury or disease shall I pick this time? Ive got quite a few, I mean, this doctor doesnt even know about my toes yet! I decide on - Arm Strain. Since I started at this job Ive had a repetitive strain injury to my right arm, its why Ive suddenly gone wiggy about my tools. I used to get shitty with people for hiding 'their' tools, but now I know why they do it. If I dont use the (one and only) short pitchfork, my arm cramps into agony. Even with the short pitch I have issues, Fingers going numb, etc, but its tolerable. So I get in. I wait. Then tell the doc about my arm.
He's a weird one this doc. He wanted to strap my poor swollen toe to its neighbor when it was pulsing with blood. I screamed to kingdom come. Since he's found out about the 'mental' issues he usually wants to blame that. But yesterday he tested both my arms and even I was shocked to see the right weaker than the left. He told ME - this is a repetitive strain from shoveling the straw. I suspect you must not shovel straw anymore. Have 2 days rest, heatpacks, and relax your muscles, then back to work. If you continue to have pain, your employer will have to rehabilitate you. Like thats going to be possible. Its my whole job. Lucky Im leaving....
And guess what? No, really, guess what!? THE JOB rang me today....The one Ive been waiting for. I have an interview next week.
Maybe it wasnt such a bad idea to quit this week?
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Comment by tlcorbin
Coffee Quip
Ha, let the lessor gods be damned to their own lives of futility, tonight you celebrate with a cool shower and break the back of the heat demons' torment. Raven
Comment by Kleonaptra
Kalikapsychosis
You are right about the heat demons. I can always feel when the battles over, and even though the suns out there trying to burn and the insects are singing with demented determination....The sun has moved and winter is early. Some old timers are saying it might even snow here!
As for the events of life....I feel like Im on a train wreck. I havnt done that much actively and yet events are snowballing all around me. Im just hanging on for the ride!
And I think, at least right now, the lesser gods are drinking with me!