The Trick with Sex
August 9th 2007 07:24
For quite sometime now Ive been planning a mature content post. Ive got so many tips and tricks - but Im sure theyre all already on the net. I know Im great in bed when I want to be, Ive always had the knowledge in my mind of exactly what to do to drive a man wild. Mostly it involves energy - a direction of your aura and specifically your AROUSAL into your partner.
But thats not what this particular post is about. This is for the great majority of women - and some men, Im not leaving you out guys - who cannot focus.
Girls, put your hand in the air IF - You have trouble getting in the mood, you can be in the mood but still too damn busy, you get into it but cant stop thinking about if you got tomorrows dinner out of the freezer, you are actually having sex but suddenly find yourself thinking if we can wrap this up in 10 mins Id have time to mop the bathroom floor.....Or of course the age old - Damn, that ceiling needs a coat of paint!
For the beginning problems - the getting in the mood - if you live with a man he will take care of that part for you. No matter how busy, no matter how broke or what problems assault you, your mans got it goin on for you ALL the time. The longer you leave him the greater the pressure becomes until he just takes you in a neanderthal fury. These lays can be fun in themselves cant they ladies?
But let me recount last night for you.....My migraine was playing chasies, I had a lot to do but Kman gave me that look that said the option of no simply wasnt on the table anymore. I thought maybe the sex might repel the migraine. But I couldnt focus - I kept thinking of what needed to be done like cooking dinner and blah blah.
I HATE this. Who else hates this? You can just feel the magic slipping through your fingers and you KNOW, even if your bodies doing ALL the right things, when your brains not there, your man feels it. He'll still get what he needs, but still feel completely unfulfilled. Even a little mental face slapping and sternly telling yourself - "Im supposed to be enjoying myself GODDAMNIT" Doesnt work. This leads to you wanting sex less and less because you and your man arent getting what you need. Its a vicious cycle, and its responsable for our divorce rate. The man thinks she doesnt love him and asks less - not so much afraid of rejection but afraid of this lackluster sex that doesnt feel like sex at all. While he's respecting you so much and not asking you assume he's lost interest. What a world.
But heres what Ive decided.......
Last night, at the mental face slapping part where Im like just fucking STRAP IT ON! I realized, this simply isnt good enough. I love this man. I adore him. The entirety of the human race is obsessed with sex - I want to be too. I want to FEEL it. I want to give him the attention he deserves.
I started to look at him. REALLY look at him. Luckily I was in a position that allowed this. I looked at his hair, his perfect eyes. Ran my fingers over his gorgeous skin. I started to think.....About how when we had just got together, I thought he was the most special person on Earth. How lucky I was to have any of his attention at all.
The thought took its time but it sunk in......The most special person on Earth is paying you ALL of his attention.....Hes right here, with you, that same boy you coveted with all your heart and was desperate to make your own, that same boy whose one phone call or smile could just MAKE your whole week.
The most special person on Earth, the one you had to have......Is yours. Forever. He's never once looked at another girl in 7 years. He's never lost interest in your body no matter what shape it is.
The most specal person on Earth is loving you right now and doing everything he can to make you HAPPY.......
The most special person on Earth......Is INSIDE you right now.
Needless to say, it was a much more pleasurable train of thought than burning the soy sauce. I found I didnt give a damn. I found, on this particular train of thought, that I always wanted to please him.
So thats my first sex tip. If you're feelin distracted, remember before your man was yours.....Remember all the effort you put into wooing him and loving him and taking him off the market for good. What aspects of him physically or mentally stimulated you SO MUCH that you couldnt stop thinking about him. Start by looking at him. REALLY looking. Not just glancing at that man who lives with you and forgets to put his clothes in the hamper and leaves newspapers around and has smelly socks and leaves coffee cups out where ants can get them. Look at the boy you fell in love with. The boy who was so sure you werent that kind of girl but damn, he'd wait for you! The boy who got so excited over small things, and loved to play. The boy thats given up so much just to grow up, become a man and a father and a breadwinner.......
You both deserve it!
But thats not what this particular post is about. This is for the great majority of women - and some men, Im not leaving you out guys - who cannot focus.
Girls, put your hand in the air IF - You have trouble getting in the mood, you can be in the mood but still too damn busy, you get into it but cant stop thinking about if you got tomorrows dinner out of the freezer, you are actually having sex but suddenly find yourself thinking if we can wrap this up in 10 mins Id have time to mop the bathroom floor.....Or of course the age old - Damn, that ceiling needs a coat of paint!
For the beginning problems - the getting in the mood - if you live with a man he will take care of that part for you. No matter how busy, no matter how broke or what problems assault you, your mans got it goin on for you ALL the time. The longer you leave him the greater the pressure becomes until he just takes you in a neanderthal fury. These lays can be fun in themselves cant they ladies?
But let me recount last night for you.....My migraine was playing chasies, I had a lot to do but Kman gave me that look that said the option of no simply wasnt on the table anymore. I thought maybe the sex might repel the migraine. But I couldnt focus - I kept thinking of what needed to be done like cooking dinner and blah blah.
I HATE this. Who else hates this? You can just feel the magic slipping through your fingers and you KNOW, even if your bodies doing ALL the right things, when your brains not there, your man feels it. He'll still get what he needs, but still feel completely unfulfilled. Even a little mental face slapping and sternly telling yourself - "Im supposed to be enjoying myself GODDAMNIT" Doesnt work. This leads to you wanting sex less and less because you and your man arent getting what you need. Its a vicious cycle, and its responsable for our divorce rate. The man thinks she doesnt love him and asks less - not so much afraid of rejection but afraid of this lackluster sex that doesnt feel like sex at all. While he's respecting you so much and not asking you assume he's lost interest. What a world.
But heres what Ive decided.......
Last night, at the mental face slapping part where Im like just fucking STRAP IT ON! I realized, this simply isnt good enough. I love this man. I adore him. The entirety of the human race is obsessed with sex - I want to be too. I want to FEEL it. I want to give him the attention he deserves.
I started to look at him. REALLY look at him. Luckily I was in a position that allowed this. I looked at his hair, his perfect eyes. Ran my fingers over his gorgeous skin. I started to think.....About how when we had just got together, I thought he was the most special person on Earth. How lucky I was to have any of his attention at all.
The thought took its time but it sunk in......The most special person on Earth is paying you ALL of his attention.....Hes right here, with you, that same boy you coveted with all your heart and was desperate to make your own, that same boy whose one phone call or smile could just MAKE your whole week.
The most special person on Earth, the one you had to have......Is yours. Forever. He's never once looked at another girl in 7 years. He's never lost interest in your body no matter what shape it is.
The most specal person on Earth is loving you right now and doing everything he can to make you HAPPY.......
The most special person on Earth......Is INSIDE you right now.
Needless to say, it was a much more pleasurable train of thought than burning the soy sauce. I found I didnt give a damn. I found, on this particular train of thought, that I always wanted to please him.
So thats my first sex tip. If you're feelin distracted, remember before your man was yours.....Remember all the effort you put into wooing him and loving him and taking him off the market for good. What aspects of him physically or mentally stimulated you SO MUCH that you couldnt stop thinking about him. Start by looking at him. REALLY looking. Not just glancing at that man who lives with you and forgets to put his clothes in the hamper and leaves newspapers around and has smelly socks and leaves coffee cups out where ants can get them. Look at the boy you fell in love with. The boy who was so sure you werent that kind of girl but damn, he'd wait for you! The boy who got so excited over small things, and loved to play. The boy thats given up so much just to grow up, become a man and a father and a breadwinner.......
You both deserve it!
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Comment by Nickoftime's Sanity Corner
what a wonderful post! So many times couples forget about the person they fell in love with...they forget the passion and the love and the lust that was once raging between them...
Sometimes all it takes to rekindle those emotions is re-examining your partbner a little bit more carefully, and seeing what made you fall in love with them in the firt place!
Most excellent read here!
Take care,
Nick
Comment by Kleonaptra
Kalikapsychosis
I really appreciate a male perspective here, because this seems to be a common problem and its so easily solved. Theres a time in the early stages where both parties are just breathless - waiting to see if the other person really does love them. That moment shouldnt die, even after we gain trust.
Comment by JohnDoe
Film & TV on DVD
Comment by Kleonaptra
Kalikapsychosis
Comment by DuskDevi
Rugby World Cup 2007
Actually Kleo...this should be in a Life and How to Live It column...
Comment by Kleonaptra
Kalikapsychosis
Hooray! a female perspective!